I'll be brief: Monday's Quick Loan Update

I attempted to apply for a loan stating that I made $24,000 per year to see if (once I get - hopefully - these other jobs) I will be able to get a loan by myself. I tried a small amount with two different types of loan and got denied immediately on both - not even a "we'll think about it"... Well, that's out I guess. 

I'm still working on figuring this one out. As a friend said "There is always a solution to a problem, (you) just have to think about it long enough."  And that is what I plan to do... 

Well, back to that. 

My first Sunday Post - Mission Impossible

“You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you.” – Brian Tracy

Well it’s Sunday June 27, 2010 and I skipped any writing on Wednesday. I’ve basically gotten to the point where I’m not sure what my next move will be; I spent five hours at the mall on Wednesday applying for jobs and picking up apps – I had a stack of resumes that got me a lot of funny looks. I have gotten five calls after that day for interviews (most of which are on Tuesday) and hopefully that will lead to a second (and maybe third) job. This will hopefully mean that I can pay all my bills and slowly (I reiterate – slowly) pay off the small but crushing debt I have (an overdue credit card, electric bills, phone bills, $500 in fees from my ex-bank, and Winter’s tuition). I have tuition mostly covered for fall semester (thank you Government loans, finally), but I have an issue… I still haven’t paid off my tuition from winter 2010 semester; I owe about $3,000 in tuition that my parents were going to pay… but they can’t. Part of the reason that they can’t is because I was unemployed for about 3 weeks. During that time I got behind on bills and now I have to beg them for some assistance. This means that neither me nor my parents are able to pay any of this tuition, something that is going to hurt my credit (like my ex-bank is doing) and inhibit me from attending school this fall (the part that is covered).

What happens if I can’t go to school is devastating (to me); I can’t be the President of the Economics Club (a position I’ve been dreaming of and finally attained), I won’t be able to get my internships next summer (will hurt my career), I won’t be able to be on the debate team (no free trips with my good friends… plus it’s really good experience), and I get behind on my education (I’m already going to be in school for a long time with my masters and Ph. D.). The thought behind dropping a semester is this: I could work full time during that semester and save up enough money to pay for winter and be good then… right? Well here’s the catch: I already plan to be working 40+ hours while in school to cover expenses, if I don’t go to school I will only be able to work slightly more hours and will be able to more almost nothing to save to pay off winter – winter’s tuition is just too high a dollar amount after taxes and bills hit my income. The issue is then that I won’t be able to go back after skipping fall because I will be stuck with bad credit (already happening) and with bills and no way to pay off winter – this means I will probably spend the rest of my life making minimum wage or just above and not accomplish any of my goals. This thought sends me into tears.

I have uncovered one possible solution: get a private loan to cover winter and some other expenses. This means that I could go to school and support myself (through my employment), I wouldn’t be asking anyone for money and I could push forward with my life. I applied for a loan by myself, but I do not have enough credit or enough income to get a loan by myself. Federal loans will only cover future semesters and not past (which is what I need), so that is out, but a private loan could be “for fall” and be used for last winter without issue. My only option left: get a cosigner to help me get the loan. My issues: since my dad lost his job he is not an ok cosigner, none of my family members who are capable of being cosigners would and none of them who would are capable. I thought about friends… same issue. I even kind of asked my boyfriend’s mom… no go there too.

So now I’m stuck wondering what I am going to do next, how I can possibly continue school and pay bills. The thought arises: would I have been better off staying at home? The response: living at home was physically and emotionally stressful, it was also hurting my relationship with my parents (we talk so much more now), and I was never home (I’d come home at 2 am after school and work and friends and leave at 6 or 7 am), and it was an hour long drive (plus it is an extra half an hour drive from my parents house to my job in Lansing which means extra money and time). A downside to moving back: my apartment complex will charge me some serious money if I break my lease.

Again, back to my question, what do I do now? Some thoughts: join the military. Not really what I wanted to do, but it would fix my problems. Downside: I may have to skip fall semester + time commitment and possibility of being sent overseas. Upside: I would definitely be able to come back to school & it doesn’t look bad on a resume.

Long shot: if I do get one or more of the jobs I’ve applied for I will be working 40+ hours and then can possibly get a private loan on my own. Downside: with my declining credit score and the debt I have already this will be unlikely.

I am looking into Angel Investing for Education and trying to find out if I could start an Angel Investing company that focuses on education for people who are crazy ambitious but for some reason can’t pay for school. Just curious... I’d love to start that business.

I hate to end this with myself in such a situation, but that is where I am at. I’ve applied for more jobs and will keep doing so until I am making enough money, I will attempt to apply for more loans and if I think of anyone who could cosign I will try to put aside my pride and I will ask them. I will approach this situation with a positive attitude always knowing that no matter what, I will survive. I will achieve my goals because I cannot see my life any other way; it may be hard, but I will have to do it, because that is who I am. I may feel desperate, this situation may seem like there is no way out, but I promise myself and my two blog followers that I will never ever give up. I’m not sure how I will do it, but I will, and through my attitude I will master change. 

-       --    Jessica

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A day in Lansing, Jessica style.

Everyone has the initial desire, when something bad happens, to crawl up in bed and beg "someone, please come take care of me". It is that moment when we need to stand up and say "I will take care of myself"; only then can we realize that we have people all around us who are actively looking for an opportunity to comfort or help us. As with anything worthwhile; we must make the first move towards our future.

It is Wednesday again, I guess I get around to writing every Wednesday… this wasn’t planned! I have more interesting news of my life for my now 2 followers! (Wow, I am getting hugely popular!) Well, yesterday was crazy, to say the least. On Tuesday I had my first day as an intern in Lansing, I am finally in politics. My first day mainly consisted of being shown how things work and where things are; I got a tour of the building (it looks like… a building), ate free lunch in the State Capitol building, and saw my soon-to-be desk area. During my first day there the State Rep I work for and his Chief of Staff asked if I’d like a paid position, I tried not to show how terribly relieved and excited I was (I assume I’m good at this because I’ve been told I’m “hard to read”), the Rep had to go see if he could get approval to pay me and I didn’t find out until the end of the day if they would let him – I found out just before I left that they could and would pay me for 20 hours a week at $10 per hour! I was so excited; I had to wait about 20 minutes (till I finally left the building and got to my car) to scream, but when I did, I screamed. You see, I went to see my mom Tuesday to talk to her; I have been trying so hard to be strong but I spent several hours just talking, and crying, to my mom because I was scared – scared that I wouldn’t find a job or couldn’t pay my rent. My mom had told me to relax, she helped me with my car payment for the month, and said to focus on my internship the next day and things would be fine. Ironic, just how right she was.

In my car in the parking garage I called and paid my car payment (already late), then I left to go home (long drive!), and was so happy. On my way home as I was merging from 496 to 127 a large white truck got behind me and neglected to pay attention to my brake lights, he then proceeded to ram his Silverado into the back of my 2002 Buick Century, causing me to hit the (also white) Colorado in front of me. I believe that somehow I hit the car in front of me more than once; it happened so quickly (I didn’t know he was going to hit me until he hit me) that I screamed, not really knowing what was happening. I walked away with a bruise and some painful whiplash (redundant?). As soon as we stopped moving I had 911 on the phone (before anyone had even gotten out of their cars), then before anything else I took pictures of everything (below). The guy in front of me was quite nice, he agreed that I was not to blame and we sat for a bit waiting for the police to come. I relaxed a bit, knowing it wasn’t my fault and that I would be ok, the guy behind me got a ticket and I was free to go. My car still drives (I drove home after) but is pretty dented. I found out today (after filing a claim with my insurance and relaxing because it would be taken care of) that my insurance ($200 a month with my 25 year old boyfriend on the policy - $400 if I’m alone, thank you) does not cover any damages to my car. I understand that I got the cheapest coverage possible, but really, can nothing work out? Sigh. It will be fine, but understandably, that was a very upsetting realization.

Pictures : (

 Back of my car - See the denting?

Now you see it better? 

Trunk lid isn't looking to good...

 The guy that hit me... 

The front of my car 

The guy in front of me 

 The inside of mine, I hit my leg and knocked this off... 

Well, Now here’s where I’m at, I am making ALMOST enough to cover my bills (this relaxes me a lot because I’m close); I now need to find a part-time job to cover the rest of my expenses (and possibly more). I have an interview tomorrow for the Caretel job in Linden; I know that there are a lot of applicants for this position, so I don’t know my chances, but I am hopeful (an interview is a good thing no matter what, this is the second interview I’ve had out of probably 200 applications, so yay). This would be a part time (weekend) job, but that is all I need now! I am not too keen on giving up all my weekends (I love going away for the weekend) but if that’s what I need to do to pay my rent, then by god I will give up my weekends. I’m considering (per the suggestions of my father and Jon) texting my ex-boss (whose kids I watched) and asking her if she hasn’t found anyone if she wants/needs me to watch the kids 2 days per week. I don’t know what her reaction will be; she let me go after all, but it is worth a shot. I’m trying to apply at stores and such, but sadly the internet connection here at Tim Hortons is somewhat lacking today (this is unusual).

Last night Mike (the boyfriend) took me to a Japanese Steak House for dinner (yum!) and we had a great time; the food was delicious!

Today my plans are; laundry (finally…), applying for a few jobs, and buying some business clothes (hopefully cheap…) for my new job!! Tomorrow is my interview and possibly some more errands and applying. I’m hoping to hear back from some of the jobs I’ve applied to soon also. After my day yesterday (crazy huh?) I am assured that anything can happen, and knowing that the possibilities are limitless… well, that is pretty inspiring.

Jessica 

Wednesday's Update; the tenacious resume submitter.

Well, it’s Wednesday and I’ve spent the last week applying for as many jobs and internships as is humanly possible and re-doing my resume to the brink of insanity. The result? Multiple job offers from well known “scam” companies (I’m not stupid, I know that cashing a check and then transferring the funds is code for money laundering and I can smell a pyramid scam from 100 miles away), one call from what I believe is a retirement community asking me to fill out their application and come in and see them, and two offers for internships (unpaid, of course).

Now the point of the internship is to help me to have the contacts and experience necessary to get my desired internship next summer. Here’s who I’ve been contacting regarding internships: All the Congressmen and State Reps in Michigan and all of the Michigan State Senators. Basically, I have been sending out emails saying “I’d like to work for you, totally free; I don’t need school credit or money I simply want to work for you. Oh, and I’m awesome”.  I have the skills, and for the low cost of nothing I am totally worth the risk; it’s the perfect economic offer. And of course I do get some benefit, the benefit of saying that I worked for XYZ Congressman/State Rep/Senator and the possible letter of recommendation… Oh how I love letters of recommendation. I’ve applied also for an internship at the Mackinac Center for Public Policy for the fall semester, it’s a bit of a drive but if it helps me to get my dream internship then I am all for it.

On an interesting and mostly unrelated note; my boyfriend now knows the full potential of my… insanity? I came over to see him and didn’t leave until he had a resume (his first ever), a cover letter, and a list of police departments and other agencies to take these items to. This took several hours…  But now he is well on his way to finding an internship, which puts him still behind in his job hunt (he graduates in December and in his field applying to the jobs he wants is competitive and the process takes 6-9 months). I find it somewhat amusing when I think about it; my boyfriend who is 6 years older than me is only just beginning his first resume and I’ve had probably 12 (I change them around a lot to keep them relevant and professional). I’ve moved out and he hasn’t (he’s not too far from school, his parents are very nice; it’s a good decision, speaking as an economist, to stay there until he gets a “real” job). I chalk all this up to our personality differences, which is good, I might go insane if I were dating myself. Some say it’s a “birth order” thing, I’m a first born and he’s the baby, I don’t know for sure what it is, but I am the way I am and he is much more laid back. I think we’re good for each other, I help him get moving and he helps me relax… which I need… often.

Quote of the day: from Socrates “I believe that we cannot live better than in seeking to become still better than we are.” I believe that I am trying to become better, by finding a new job and through these internships, and so this quote made me smile. Yes, there are several times every day that I want to quit and just curl up into a ball in my apartment until they kick me out, but I can’t do that, because I know that with just a little effort I can become something amazing and put myself in a better position. I know that with hard work and determination I can accomplish all my goals, be it getting a job, changing the world, or paying my rent.

Now the good stuff; tomorrow my day will be spent driving around, first off is the interview with the State Rep’s Chief of Staff, after that is dropping by that business in Linden that called me (I’ll bring my resume and references and a cover letter even though all they require is an application), after that I may go see my friend Jon for a bit, and I will be calling the administrative staffing agency that I am trying to join to set up a time to do some testing. It makes me happy to see that my hard work has paid off, albeit only slightly, but this is still a start. Of course I’ll spend some time applying for jobs tomorrow; I spent today applying for jobs and for internships with Congressmen. I have some printing to do tonight (here I come UPS Store, get ready) and some faxing/shipping, but otherwise I think I’m done for the night. I got a twitter account, I suppose as part of my job hunt… I posted my quote of the day on there; otherwise I’m not a big twitter person. I’ve been editing my linkedin account as well; I had a professor look it over for me and I changed a bunch of stuff.

So where am I on my mission? Well, I still don’t have a job (I have till the end of June to get one), I have 2 potential internships and I’ve applied for many more, and I have one potential job lead. That is after one week on the hunt; I think I’m doing well. You’ve got to stay positive in life; it’s not “Oh, this terrible thing happened, crap” it’s “Oh look, now it’s time for some life changes, this could be good! Let’s get moving!” attitude has a lot to do with how your life ends up, and I’d like my life to be looking up. So I sit at Panera or Tim Horton’s for between 7 and 12 hours per day applying for jobs and bettering myself, I see no problem with that. 

The New Old Jessica

I was sitting at the bar with some random people I had just met drinking my iced tea and eating desert (I had gone into Applebees alone, deeply in need of chocolate) when it happened, I said it and it reminded me of everything I had forgotten. Here is some context, we were laughing and talking about religious schools and how many of them focus on getting women married, not educated (a horrible over generalization... or is it?) and I said "I didn't go to school to get married, I went to school to make more money than most men I know". Suddenly, after saying it, I remembered how much power I used to feel-and more importantly, the passion I had to change the world.

The last few months had gotten me down, I felt as though the world was too hard and I’d never catch a break. I laugh when I think about how silly and simple a sentence it was, it wasn’t even a particularly important conversation, but it brought back the real Jessica. So here I am, and I’m ready to take over (err, fix?) the world. I’m on a mission, and my zero blog followers will be here with me as I take my journey.

My mission:

• · Get a job (I’ve got to pay my rent!)
• · Get my internship (I’ll tell you which ones I want later)
• · Get into Government (I don’t want to be a politician; I just want to change things and get paid for it).
• · Change the school system (people should be able to learn easier and be more employable upon graduation from high school)
• · Change the financial aid system (currently, unless your parents have money, it is terribly hard to get aid).
• · Fix the Economy (or at least do my part… Flint, here I come).

How will I achieve this? That’s the work in progress. Currently, if you are a Michigan State Senator, one of your interns or assistants may have received an interesting email on your behalf. If you are wondering who the crazy econ student is who wants to work for you for free is, well that would be me. The point of this is, I want to get real world work experience so that I can get a job, and working in government would also help me to get any of the internships I want. Funny story; I’ve managed my own business, cleaned houses and been a nanny, worked for the Census, and sold ads… I’m more than proficient in Microsoft Office programs, can type 70 wpm, and am an excellent communicator… and yet I don’t have enough experience to be a bank teller. I’m an economics major. I’m certain that people less qualified than I are hired as bank tellers. This job hunt is confusing.

How to get a job:

I plan to get certified as a Microsoft Office Specialist (I’ve taken the first steps, now it’s about practicing and getting the money), it seems that employers prefer certifications to simply stating that you are proficient (at least that will help). I’m considering getting other certifications as well (computer based) to prove my proficiency, again it’s a money thing. Otherwise, I’ve applied for at least 50 jobs a day every day since I lost my job (Wednesday). It’s funny that there are more than 200 jobs and yet none of them want me. I’ve worked on my resume constantly, trying to make it more appealing (I found a typo! Oh my!), I’ve found temp companies and more job search engines (sorry, if you are an employer, and I’ve applied for your job more than once). Besides that, I’m not sure what else I can do? I’ll be talking to friends and professors for help… I really need to pay my rent.

Next steps for the internship:

As for my internship (I’m talking about summer of 2011 here people)… I’m interested in a few, my top 2 being:

• · CEA (Council of Economic Advisors, unpaid – in DC)
• · CIA (they offer internships for many different majors, this type is more of an investment in your future as some of their internships are fully paid and include a requirement that you work for the CIA summers and then 1.5x the years they paid you – they pay you all year and pay for school!)

Both seem VERY competitive! But both would be a great way to start my Economic/Government (Political) career. If I want to change the world, these internships will help me do that. So how do I get them? Per the advice of a professor of mine I’m considering writing economic articles for the school’s paper (I’m going to write up some articles, publish them in a different blog, and then submit my “portfolio” to the school paper in July to see if I can get a very low paying gig as a writer). If I were to get a job working for any type of government (local, state, federal) that would help me get these internships, also if I get some sort of administrative job that would help, those are skills that make a desirable intern (of course, certification and no job history is still pretty good). I’ve been a research assistant on a paper two of my professors wrote, but that was a small-time gig, I need to be the absolute best candidate for these positions.

Well, my plans for the next day or so (until I write again) are to look up more programs, classes, or certifications that I can get to help me get these internships (and possibly a job in the mean time). I also plan to unveil my drastic hair change (yes, I drastically changed my hair today) to friends and family!

That’s all for now!

Jess